


Not up for Debate

by lovinghyungline



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Chaptered, Debate Team, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Intellectual Min Yoongi, Internalized Homophobia, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Philosophy Major Kim Namjoon | RM, Rivals to Lovers, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-06-16 06:14:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15430755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovinghyungline/pseuds/lovinghyungline
Summary: Min Yoongi and Kim Namjoon are on rivaling university debate teams. One particular debate over the rights of LGBT students makes Yoongi decide to change this. He becomes endlessly interested in Namjoon, and Namjoon helps him reassess and overcome the stereotypes he thought he knew, and blossom into a new person. Along with the help of Namjoon's friends, Yoongi experiences a colorful world he never thought he'd get to be a part of.





	1. The Great Debate

Debate team was never really considered the coolest club in high school, but that changed for Min Yoongi after entering university. He was once the ruthless regulating class president of his high school class, and now he was a ruthless debater. He chalked it up to both his skills he learned in his former club, and the collective hours of debating he did with trouble-making students in the classroom. Of course, his chosen school, Korea University, was one of the top universities when it came to their debating skills, but he didn’t do it for the fame. He did it for the facts. The intense adrenaline rush he felt during debates was addicting. All the hours of research that he and his club did usually paid off on the floor when they spit facts and well thought out retorts to their rivals’ arguments. The feeling of success after a hard fought debate was easily the most rewarding aspect of his life. He easily spent all of his spare time in the library bulking up his knowledge on anything he could get his hands on. He kept brackets of their wins and losses for the year, and he was the lead debater in his school's organization. For him, this was his life.

While it was usually smooth sailing for Yoongi, he always seemed to get tripped up by his rival from the Yonsei team, Kim Namjoon. Their rivalry was known throughout the school, and whenever he saw Namjoon on campus, he knew that things would be getting serious. Yoongi was a competitive man. He didn’t like being wrong. And he especially didn’t like losing in a debate. However, Namjoon made riling Yoongi up so easy. Maybe it was his laid back personality, or the way it seemed like he was looking down on everyone (when in reality he was just tall). In all honesty, Yoongi didn’t like the other man because he was just another rival. He didn’t know Namjoon personally, but he didn’t want to. He wanted to keep his nose to the books, and stay 2 steps ahead.

Their great debate was in the middle of the fall semester. The trees outside the window of the lecture hall were brilliant oranges and yellows, and the sunlight lit the room naturally. Yoongi and his teammates were sat at one great wooden table, and Namjoon’s team was sat at another. The two of them were next to each other across the aisle, but Yoongi would let that faze him. He’d been preparing for this debate for the past week, and he wasn’t going to be distracted by Namjoon or his pink hair. In his opinion, it was a gaudy color. And totally unprofessional for such an event. But he wasn’t going to let it distract him.

He pushed up the sleeves of his university sweater, and straightened out the three sharpened pencils next to his regulation blank sheet of paper and research materials. The question they’d be debating was distributed, and Yoongi couldn’t help but notice that Namjoon seemed less than pleased. “Should LGBT issues be taught in schools?” That’s when Yoongi’s stomach tied in knots, but he pushed it down. This was a debate, and they’d just been handed the winning side. It would be as easy as pie. Whatever that meant.

Namjoon stood up for the opening argument, cleared his throat, and scratched his head before he began. It seemed he realized his position was doomed from the start as well.

“Education about the LGBT community in schools is important just as education about any other minority group is. By promoting the rights and education of this minority in Korea, the country can become more united and hopefully move forward in the same way many other countries around the world have. Other countries in Asia have been taking steps to be more inclusive towards the LGBT community, so why shouldn’t Korea?”

It was a noble attempt, but Yoongi knew that the bias in the situation was skewed in his direction, and he’d play on this easily. Even the knots in his gut couldn’t stop him from winning this debate. Why would he wash research down the drain for the sake of feelings? He stood up confidently, taking a last look at his notes before he would make his counterargument.

“The idea of teaching young students in school about the plight of any LGBT minority is not necessary in the slightest.” He began, watching the proctors. He was hoping to appeal emotionally to the judges rather than just relying solely on facts. “The institution is solely for educating students for the future, and the curriculum should be based solely on facts. There is no time for exploring something as frivolous as supposed sexuality.”

Namjoon was clearly frowning by the time Yoongi sat back down, but Yoongi was feeling good. They had time to talk to each other and write notes to counter the other team’s arguments. He confidently scribbled down notes, trying to poke holes in any argument that Namjoon would be making. Slippery slope arguments were simple, but would be effective in this argument.

“What about studies that say that sexuality is innate, that we are born into it? Teaching about LGBT history would be an effective way to educate students while also leading them to be more open-minded towards any of their LGBT peers.” Namjoon stated quickly, clearly invested in this argument. Yoongi didn’t want to think too hard about why.

“There are just as many studies saying that sexuality is a construct formed by a child’s environment. And if those studies are correct, then wouldn’t it be irresponsible to introduce students to the lifestyle of the LGBT when they are still at an impressionable age?” Yoongi asked, leaving Namjoon looking appalled. The other man went back to his notes and began scribbling intensely. His tongue was even peeking out of the corner of his mouth.

Yoongi continued, “If we start teaching students about the history of the LGBT community, where will we have to stop? Would our quest for inclusivity alienate the other students? Other countries are even suggesting sex education that caters to students in this community. If the country can’t even decide whether being gay is okay, then educating students on such a polarizing subject seems irresponsible.”

At this, Namjoon stopped writing, and waited for his turn to give the rebuttal. His brows were furrowed, and his notes looked sloppy. He was watching the judges intensely, his teammate whispering something into his ear before he nodded.

“While we’ve been talking about students wellbeing, we haven’t looked at the suicide rates that affect so many high school students in Korea. Continuing with the widely accepted theory that people are born into the LGBT community, wouldn’t it be irresponsible to ignore those students who are bullied for being gay? Many studies show that the suicide rate of a student of a sexual minority is much higher than their supposedly normal peers.” Namjoon debated fiercely, not even looking at his notes until the statistic was put under his nose by his peer. “Statistics show that LGB youth are almost three times as likely to commit suicide than their straight peers.”

Yoongi looked up at his notes at that. He felt bad about debating this subject, especially when Namjoon seemed so personally affected by it. But his passion for the subject was inspiring. It was almost… Attractive? No, he wasn’t thinking about that in the middle of a debate. Especially not this debate.

“Not only do these students risk being rejected by their families, but they’re also rejected by our society. By educating students, we would be normalizing a minority that we know exists. This is one way that is proven to decrease suicidality in students, and it causes no harm to students not in that community-”

“Time!” The proctor shouted, face impassive.

“But-!”

“Time!” The proctor shut him down without a second thought. Both Yoongi and Namjoon flinched. They knew the rules, and they knew that there was no room for argument outside of the actual debate.

Namjoon didn’t look like he’d finished by a long shot, but there was nothing he could do. It didn’t seem like the judges were moved by Namjoon’s speech at all. Honestly, Yoongi’s stomach dropped for him. Being in front of a panel that didn’t care about their arguments, no matter how strongly they felt was always a terrible feeling. But this was to his advantage, and honestly he wasn’t surprised.

“Closing arguments, please.” The proctor said, voice almost bored. The debate was passing so quickly, and Yoongi was still reeling, but he gathered his teammates’ final arguments before standing to play the messenger. To deliver the final nail in the coffin.

“Without much conclusive evidence being found in Korea itself, we have no idea how large the minority population of LGBT people there even are, let alone in the student population. All facts that have been brought to this debate have been pulled from other countries data. In today’s climate, in this country, it doesn’t make sense to introduce impressionable students to the history of the LGBT community. Not only is it potentially irresponsible, but it is also unlikely that there is room in already existing curriculum for as small a minority as the LGBT when there are bigger things to discuss.”

It hurt to say, but it was the truth, and Yoongi was only the messenger. There was no way Namjoon could have won this debate. Not in Korea, not in a million years. Well, maybe in a million years, but they’d all be gone by then. It was unfortunate, but he had to be realistic about it. Otherwise he couldn’t go on with his life.

Still, Namjoon’s last appeal to the judges was emotional. Yoongi respected that even at the end, he still fought for his side, whether he believed it or not.

“While the statistics we used were from other countries, they would apply to Korea just as well. This country is fine with pushing this minority community out of the picture for the sake of seeming normal, but that doesn’t stop struggling gay students from existing. Educating students is the job of the government, even if it is over a hotly debated subject. Demonizing any sort of education would be more harmful and irresponsible. Thank you.”

The frown was still plain on Namjoon’s face, but it was up to the judges now. It was a harsh statement to begin with, and no one in the room looked too pleased. Even Namjoon’s teammates seemed caught off-guard by his pointed tone. The judges only took a few minutes to deliberate before the victory went to Korea University and Yoongi’s debate team. It still felt bittersweet seeing how frustrated Namjoon was as he packed up his materials. Maybe Yoongi was going soft, but he was interested in what else Namjoon had to say. It was clear that he was incredibly intellectual, and his facts had been straight. His arguments had always been clear, while also being emotionally appealing. This had just been one rigged game, no matter how impartial the judges claimed to be.

He waited for everyone else to file out of the room, slowly putting together his papers, filing away his debate notes, and sliding his pencils back into his plain pencil case. He even unrolled his sleeves as he waited for Namjoon to finish chatting with his colleagues. He didn’t even know what the hell he was doing, waiting for his rival like this, but his pursuit for knowledge was stronger than his own self doubt.

When Namjoon finally waved his friends goodbye, Yoongi stepped forward to tap his shoulder, hitching his bag up on his shoulder. The surprised expression on the other man’s face was to be expected, Yoongi didn’t think he’d ever talked to Namjoon outside of a debate. He was making a pretty big exception.

“Congrats on the win. You’re always a good opponent.” Namjoon said sheepishly, holding out his hand for a handshake.

“Well, you never let winning come easy…” Yoongi admitted, taking the offered hand and giving him two firm shakes before letting go. “I was just wondering, though… I mean, you made some pretty interesting points in the debate. Could we talk more about it?”

He wasn’t exactly good at this sort of thing. He didn’t even know what he was asking exactly. But the bright smile that graced the taller man’s face after he asked made his heart do a weird flip-flop.

“Sure. Want to go talk over coffee?”

That was the direct way to Yoongi’s heart, and he immediately nodded, following Namjoon as he lead him out the door.

They ended up at a campus cafe that Yoongi had visited a dozen times before. After all, they were on his campus, but he preferred it that way. He wasn’t usually keen on visiting places he’d never been before. He was definitely a creature of habit. They ordered, and Namjoon insisted on paying while Yoongi found them a couple of comfy seats in the corner. It felt more private that way. Namjoon came to the table with their drinks, and plopped into his seat happily, that fact made obvious by the smile still on his face.

“So, what did you want to talk about? Did you have questions?” He said, getting straight to the point.

Yoongi picked up his drink, and swirled it around in contemplation.

“How do you know so much about the LGBT community? I mean, I know we all research, but it seemed like you really knew what you were talking about. Like, you really seemed emotional when you spoke. It was pretty impressive.”

Yoongi hated admitting it, but mostly because he was terrible at giving compliments. Namjoon just seemed amused.

“Are you asking me if I’m gay?”

That wasn’t exactly what Yoongi had been asking, but he was definitely curious.

“Well, the answer is, yes, in any case. And aside from being on the debate team, I’m a member of the LGBT students organization at my own school. I’m kind of the vice president, actually.”

That immediately caught Yoongi’s attention, and he leaned forward in his seat, feeling like he had been handed a secret.

“Really?” He asked quietly.

“Yes,” Namjoon replied just as softly, though he was clearly just playing with Yoongi. “I’m not ashamed. That’s the reason I was so emotional, as you said. I really care about the stuff I was talking about. I do think students have the right to feel safe in school.”

“Just for the record, I don’t disagree with you. I just wanted to win the debate.” Yoongi admitted before taking a sip of his drink.

He felt awkward, as though Namjoon was somehow blaming him for not bending to his side. When in reality he was most definitely on Namjoon’s side. He was just terrified of that fact. While Namjoon was wide open, Yoongi was closed off. That much was evident just by looking at their body language. Namjoon was sitting back with body language open, Yoongi was hunched over, curled up as small as possible. That’s just how he thought the best.

“It’s fine, Yoongi. You weren’t the one who gave the prompt. You were just doing your job as team leader, and you did a damn good job.”

If anything could make Yoongi blush, that was the compliment. As much as Namjoon was his “rival” the man was also someone he respected greatly. Even more so considering he was everything that Yoongi wished he could be. He was confident and open and stood tall as he walked into a room. Yoongi was unassuming, so his fierce debating abilities often caught his opponents off guard. He was already so drawn to Namjoon, and he’d only been talking to him for a few minutes.

Namjoon’s phone buzzed, and he checked it quickly before sighing.

“Listen, I’d love to talk more, but I really should get back to my teammates. We’ve got another debate tomorrow. I’ll give you my phone number, and we can chat later, okay?” Namjoon smiled dazzlingly, scribbling down on his notes before passing the paper to Yoongi.

“Oh, y-yeah, sure. I’ll text you? Thanks for the drink, Namjoon.” He smiled softly, picking up the piece of paper, and looking it over. In the corner was Namjoon’s number, but the rest of the paper held his notes from the debate. Even after Namjoon left, he continued studying it, endlessly fascinated with how the other man’s mind worked.

His emotions were written out on the page. First were his facts, which Yoongi reconstructed with the debate in his head. The lines were straight and neat, but he could see how his frustration grew during the debate. In the beginning the page was neatly filled with statistics about suicide rate, where education had been beneficial, and even small citations. Clearly, Namjoon knew this stuff off the top of his head. About half way through Yoongi’s counterargument, the words became darker, more pencil pressure was used to write them. The letters weren’t as consistently sized, and towards the end, he’d ended up scribbling in the middle of the paper. Even though he hadn’t written his feelings about the debate in his notes, Yoongi could read his emotions clearly just by seeing the progression on the paper. If only he could have heard all of Namjoon’s argument, he was sure he’d have lost the debate.

After spending what must have been an hour reading every detail of Namjoon's notes, he pulled out his phone, and put the man's number in. He barely had any contacts aside from his teammates, and they only really talked about details for their debates. Making friends wasn't something Yoongi was really used to. It actually made him smile as he typed in the numbers to create Namjoon as a contact. He wanted to meet with him again. He wanted to know more than what was just on a piece of paper. He wanted to know what it meant to be a part of the LGBT community. All his life he'd suppressed his sexuality, channeling his anxiety into his education. But he was almost a senior in college, and he had no idea who he was outside of his academics. He wanted to learn, and he wanted Namjoon to show him who he could be.

He agonized over how to start the conversation for the rest of the day. Now that he'd really talked to his supposed rival, he was beginning to realize that the pent up jealousy that he'd been harboring for the man may or may not have been attraction. Who could have guessed? He just felt so in the dark that he didn't want to say something ridiculous. His biggest fear was that this would somehow be a joke, and that he would be a joke. Just the thought made his chest tighten uncomfortably. However, something about Namjoon just made him seem trustworthy. Maybe it was because the man had bought him a coffee. Maybe it was because of his bright smile. He just seemed like an easy person to be around, and Yoongi realized how desperately he wanted to be a part of that. He wanted to be a part of something more.

It was almost midnight, and he'd been fitfully trying to sleep. Thoughts were bouncing around in his head, and wouldn't let him rest. So, out of a fit of frustration, he rolled over to pick up his phone from where it was charging on the nightstand, and he typed out something he'd never told anyone else before, "Namjoon, it's me, Yoongi. I'm gay. Can you help me figure this out?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this first chapter. I'm not sure how long this work is going to be quite yet, but I'm having a great time writing it! Please leave a comment or kudos if you enjoyed, and tell me what you liked!
> 
> My AUs are on my twitter @lovinghyungline


	2. The Best Time

Namjoon had texted Yoongi back immediately telling him that they could meet again soon, and Yoongi was so relieved. But he also felt different. Was he different? Being gay never felt different for him, but maybe he was doing it wrong. Maybe he should buy clothes that weren’t just official university sweaters. His closet was full of the dullest colors. Did he have to dress colorful like Namjoon? He always did like colors, he just never thought they’d look good on him.

His parents had always been conservative. They never really talked to him about sexuality, let alone homosexuality. They were the ones that pushed him into academic pursuits over a social life anyway. Maybe they were just protecting him, but he felt so naive. Even though he’d read so many books and articles, and met so many people, he’d never really gone out with anyone. He hadn’t even dated in high school. What if he wasn’t cool enough to hang out with Namjoon?

As much as he agonized over it, he had to go meet the man anyway because he’d invited him out in the first place. He wanted to know more about Namjoon, and he wanted to know more about what it meant to be gay. Namjoon was so out there and open, and Yoongi just wanted a part of that. He wanted to own who he was, and not be so afraid of opening up. He just wanted to make friends.

They decided to meet at the same coffee shop as the day before, but they probably wouldn’t stay there. Yoongi felt restless. He needed to walk around, and get rid of his nervous energy. Besides, he thought better when he was doing something.

“Yoongi!” He heard Namjoon yell for his attention, and he turned around to see that same dimply smile. It made his heart beat uncomfortably fast.  
“Hi, Namjoon. Thanks for coming.” He said quietly, rubbing at his arm awkwardly. He wasn’t exactly sure how to greet him, but Namjoon pulled him into a one armed hug when he reached him. It was nice how easily he fit against Namjoon’s side, but he shook the thought away. Maybe the other man didn’t even like him that way. He didn’t even know what he was doing.

“So… You wanted to talk about some stuff, right? Should we get coffee first?” He asked, already seeming like he knew Yoongi’s answer because he lead them towards the door of the shop.

Yoongi nodded but it felt redundant. He looked down at his scuffed converse, and he followed after Namjoon. It was just easy to go along with whatever he did. His personality was magnetic. Once more, Namjoon paid for their coffees, and they were soon on their way. It was the weekend, and a lot of people were out, so Yoongi felt comfortable walking by someone’s side. Usually, he was alone, and kept his head down as he speed walked to the library. Watching the wind move through the trees on campus was refreshing. And every time he looked back to Namjoon he had some form of a smile on his face.

He picked at the sleeve on his cup hesitantly before looking up at Namjoon. “What exactly do you do in your, um, LGBT… Club?”

Namjoon looked pensive for a moment, kicking up some of the leaves that had fallen on the path before he answered, “We help people like you, mostly.”

“Like me?” Yoongi asked with a frown, unsure of what that meant.

“People in the community that don’t know how they fit in yet. Our organization also does a lot of activism, and we plan pride events on campus. Usually, we talk about the issues we debated about yesterday.” Namjoon chuckled, kicking at another leaf. It was cute.

“I’d like to talk about that stuff. I really have no idea how I fit in. I barely know what it means to be gay.” He admitted, brows drawn together.

“Well, usually it means you like guys.”

Namjoon had a shit-eating grin on his face at that comment, and Yoongi couldn’t help but laugh. Which he hated because it wasn’t even funny, and he nudged Namjoon’s side with his elbow playfully. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it.” He chuckled, looking back to his feet against the concrete. He didn’t know where they were walking, but he didn’t care too much.

“It doesn’t have to mean anything, though, Yoongi. You can just live your life normally and like guys. I know that today that seems like an oxymoron, but it’s just… Normal.”

Honestly, Yoongi never thought it could be like that. That being gay would ever be considered normal. But he wanted so badly to get to that point. He didn’t want to believe it anymore when people said it was a sin, when society said it was gross. He wasn’t gross; he was an exceptional student, and he could be gay.

“It can mean more, though. It can mean you can be your authentic self. If you’ve been hiding, then it’s okay to come out. Join the world as you are, you know?”

Yoongi didn’t know, though. He didn’t know who his “true authentic self” was, or how he could find them. He assumed it would take a lot of searching. That was why he wanted help in the first place. Was there some different side to him that was begging to be let out?

“That’s what I need your help with. I don’t know who I am. And I want to.” He stopped in his tracks, and Namjoon stopped, too, looking at him curiously. “You’ll help me, right?” He asked sincerely, looking right at Namjoon. Maybe he’d find out that this was him all along, but he wanted to know that with confidence.

Namjoon just smiled again, and wrapped an arm around Yoongi’s shoulder. “Don’t worry, dude. I know some people who can help get you there.”

And Namjoon was not wrong.

He went out to dinner with Namjoon, and met his colorful group of friends at a nice pizza place in the middle of Seoul. Hopefully, they didn’t change hair colors as often as Namjoon because then he could never keep them straight. The one with the nice smile and the chubby cheeks with the blonde mop of hair was Jimin, who was followed by Taehyung who had the brightest blonde mullet Yoongi had ever seen, who was next to Jungkook who was covered head to toe in black but had the sparkliest eyes, and he was next to Seokjin who immediately blew Yoongi a kiss before he’d even said his name (and he looked like an actual model), and he was next to Hoseok who’s hair was such a bright red that it was almost brighter than his smile. They were all crammed into a corner booth at the place, and seemed to talk over each other constantly. Namjoon told him that that was very normal for them.

They all seemed to know who Yoongi was, which meant that Namjoon had to have talked about him before because he’d never seen any of the other men in his life. Jimin complimented his natural hair and thin frame, while Seokjin was simultaneously tearing his outfit apart by calling his sweater and converse “overdone.” He didn’t know whether to say “thanks” or if he should have been angry. Namjoon just laughed and told them to go easy on him, which he appreciated. He wasn’t used to meeting so many new people all at once.

“Yoongi-hyung, you have to know Namjoon-hyung talks about you all the time, right? Like, I’m surprised he hasn’t asked you out before now.” Jimin said conversationally, as if it was common knowledge that Namjoon had a crush on him. Yoongi was left with a dropped jaw as he looked at an embarrassed Namjoon. The taller man was now blushing furiously, and Jimin just cackled.

“H-He didn’t ask me out, though?” Yoongi replied weakly, which caused a ripple effect of whispering around the table.

“So… Did you ask him out, hyung?” Hoseok directed toward him, and now Yoongi was the one blushing.

“I… I guess so? I asked him to meet with me, is that the same thing?”

Seokjin and Hoseok gave each other a devious look before they both nodded quickly.

“No wonder he called us all here today. He seemed pretty happy on the phone. I thought he’d finally gotten laid.” Seokjin said in commiseration before making a sound that Yoongi assumed was his laugh.

“Shut up, guys, we don’t need to be talking about my sex life, thanks.” Namjoon said, clearly embarrassed. But that seemed to make the others want to pick on him more.

“Don’t be embarrassed, Joonie-hyung! It’s only been a month, that’s not too tragic.” Jimin laughed, nudging Taehyung, who now had his arm slung across Jimin’s shoulders. Jungkook was just laughing to himself in the middle of the group.

Yoongi just felt lost. He’d never even kissed anyone before, yet they were talking about having sex. This was way out of his depth, and he shrunk back into his seat while Namjoon’s face sizzled with heat. Honestly, the color was darker than his hair. Yoongi thought it was pretty cute, though, seeing the usually unshakable man reduced to being embarrassed by his friends. He was just a normal guy, too.

“What about you, Yoongi? You’ve been quiet.” Seokjin asked, and Yoongi felt like he’d been caught. His eyes went wide, and everyone looked smitten, cooing about how cute he was. Even Namjoon was looking at him out of the corner of his eyes.

“Me? I’ve never done… It before.”

Everyone’s faces went blank for a moment before Jimin practically leaned over the table, watching him like he was some rare curiosity. “You’re serious?” He said in a surprisingly low voice, taking Yoongi further aback.

“Yes?” He said hesitantly, looking over at Namjoon as if the man could somehow help him in this situation.

“Guys, he barely just came out. Stop scaring him, he can take things at his own pace, okay?” Namjoon said, picking up on Yoongi’s signal. It made relief spread in his chest to hear Namjoon’s words, too. He could do things at his own pace. That was so nice to hear.

“But like, you’ve never done anything?” The question came from Jungkook this time. And it made everyone laugh.

“Jungkook is a total virgin, too. Don’t worry. He’s our project.” Taehyung smiled, though his lips looked like a box around his perfect teeth. Then, he put his other arm around a sheepish looking Jungkook, pulling both him and Jimin close.

Now, Yoongi felt extremely embarrassed, so he picked a piece of pizza up from the half empty pan in front of them, and ate. He couldn’t say anything embarrassing if his mouth was full. Because apparently he was super embarrassing. He couldn’t dress right, and he couldn’t even keep up with boys three years his junior. Everyone around the table each had a clear personality, and he could tell just by looking at them. Looking at himself, his personality was just… University. He didn’t want that to be the only thing about him anymore.

“Help me, then! I want to be cool like you guys.” He said, a little too excitedly. But everyone looked at him fondly.

“You’re so sweet.” Jimin smiled brilliantly.

“We’re all different types of messes, there’s no such thing as cool.” Taehyung said cooly, sitting back in his seat, though he was still tightly wound around Jimin and Jungkook.

Yoongi rolled his eyes at that one, but he appreciated the sentiment.

“If you want to be cool, don’t let Hoseok dress you, unless you want to look like the bisexual hypebeast from hell.” Seokjin said deadly serious, earning a hurt look from Hoseok. “Hey, I dress cool.” He retorted, to which Seokjin smiled sympathetically, patting his back. “Sure you do, babe.”

Yoongi looked away when Namjoon shyly wrapped an arm around his shoulder. “Listen, Yoongi, you don’t have to worry so much. We’ll help you, okay? But it’s gotta happen naturally, too.” To which Yoongi nodded, letting himself lean into Namjoon’s side. Maybe he was getting ahead of himself. He didn’t even know where to start. He believed that being with Namjoon would help him though. That was the only thing he was sure of at this point; that he liked Namjoon.

“Listen guys, I’ll give Yoongi all of your numbers, but I think he’s getting overwhelmed with all of you, so we’re gonna head out.” Namjoon said, meeting a lot of sad groans from his friends. “Hey, don’t worry, we’ll see you around.” He assured them, to which a cacophony of goodbyes met Yoongi’s ears.

Honestly, he was getting a little overwhelmed. And Namjoon lead him out of the place (after leaving money on the table) with an arm around Yoongi the whole time. It was a nice feeling. One that Yoongi hadn’t really felt before.

“Sorry if that was a lot, Yoongi, I just thought you might want to meet my friends. They can be a little overwhelming all at once.” Namjoon said when they were back outside. He removed his arm from around Yoongi, which made him pout. He’d liked being tucked into Namjoon’s side.

“No, they were nice. I think.” Yoongi’s pout deepened as he actually thought about their conversation. In any case, he was happy to have more friends.

“About what they said, though… I mean, I do like you. Did you really mean to ask me out?”

Namjoon’s question was surprising, but what was more surprising was how bashful he looked while asking it. Clearly he was nervous. Which Yoongi was surprised about because he wasn’t exactly… Okay, maybe he could be a little intimidating.

“Honestly, I don’t know. But I know that I like you. So, I want to ask you out.” He said carefully, looking up at Namjoon as his face transformed back into a big smile. That made Yoongi smile, too.

“Okay. Cool. Did you wanna come over and listen to some music or something?” He asked quickly, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly.

Yoongi nodded excitedly in reply, taking Namjoon’s hand boldly. He’d never done anything like that before, but it was rewarding. As someone who usually kept to himself, he was never one to initiate contact with other people. Even when he was with his family, they were hardly affectionate. At least, not physically. In recent memory, the most affectionate Yoongi’s father had ever been with him was when he gave him a firm pat on the back when he got into Korea University. Giving genuine hugs was still a difficult task for him. However, holding Namjoon’s hand was really nice. Like, nicer than he ever thought holding someone’s hand would be. Maybe that was just another thing he had been wrong about all this time.

Namjoon led him to his apartment, which was only a short bus ride away. Apparently they could have walked, but the night was getting chilly, and Namjoon was enough of a gentleman to suggest that they take the faster route. Yoongi was grateful considering he was only wearing a sweater, and his legs were tired from the walking they’d done earlier.

The bus was crowded, which made Yoongi a bit nervous, but Namjoon didn’t let go of his hand the whole time. Even though they got a few stares, he just focused on holding onto the handrail, and onto Namjoon’s hand. Their hands fit together surprisingly well, and the other man didn’t let his go even though he was sure his palms were starting to sweat. They were just standing so close together, almost touching, and Yoongi didn’t know what to do with himself. He’d never been so conscious of his own breathing before, each breath he pulled in was of Namjoon’s cologne, each breath was too loud, and he felt like holding it in. He just stared straight at Namjoon’s chest, almost blankly, tracing the letters on his sweatshirt with his eyes over and over again.

He broke out of his trance when the bus jolted to a stop, and Namjoon squeezed his hand to pull his attention. “This is our stop.” He said quietly, waiting for Yoongi to nod before he pulled him towards the back exit of the bus. When they were outside in the crisp air again was when Yoongi felt like he could take a deep breath. He didn’t know what was happening to him. He still felt dazed, his body still tingling, probably from the oxygen he’d denied himself on the bus. Maybe Namjoon would think he was weird by being so affected by something as small as close proximity, so he didn’t say anything. He just tried not to trip over his own feet as they finished the short walk to Namjoon’s apartment.

“Just to warn you, my apartment isn’t exactly fancy or anything. But I try to keep it clean.” He laughed, pulling out his keys to unlock the bland white door.

Yoongi held no expectations, couldn’t imagine the type of place Namjoon lived, so he was only curious as he stepped in the doorway. He looked around as he took off his shoes, taking in the mismatched furniture, and movie posters taped to the walls. It was small, but so was Yoongi’s place. Small spaces didn’t bother him in the slightest, it was only when they were packed with people that he had an issue.

“It’s nice.” He commented, finally shuffling inside on his socked feet.

The first thing he went to look at were the two different sized bookshelves crammed full of colorful spines and bold text. A whole shelf was full of dictionaries and language books. There were English titles that even he didn’t recognize. Come to think of it, he didn’t even know what Namjoon was majoring in, he just knew he was in debate team. He started picking at a copy of Kafka on the Shore before he felt Namjoon’s hand on his shoulder.

“Why am I not surprised the first thing you notice are the books?” He asked in a playful voice, the sound sending a shiver down Yoongi’s spine.

He shrugged, “I like reading.”

“You can borrow any you like. Do you like music, too?” Namjoon asked, squeezing Yoongi’s shoulder before moving off to find something.

“I listen to a lot of classical and movie soundtracks when I study. I played piano as a child.” He smiled, running his fingers over the books’ spines. Some were well worn and some were still pristine. He wanted to know the stories behind each of them.

He only turned around when he heard a loud thump, and he saw Namjoon spreading a diverse set of records over the coffee table. The man looked pensive as he ran his fingers over the covers, making it seem as if this decision would change the world. Yoongi moved to one of the couches, sitting on the edge so he could look at the records, too. The last time he’d seen one was when his old piano teacher would play one for his lessons, trying to impress in him the beauty of the music. But she’d been very old. He had no idea how Namjoon had come upon such a large collection.

When he was caught staring, his question was answered. “Most of this is my dad’s. He gave me the record player, and I collected the records from him and from some old thrift shops. You’d be surprised how many are out there.”

His hand paused over a colorful cover, and he picked it up in the next moment, carefully sliding the vinyl out of its case before placing it in the open player. Namjoon went through the whole process very gently, as if everything was made of glass, and the machine clicked when he turned it on. Soon, an unfamiliar song started playing, upbeat synth music followed by a drum beat, and english lyrics he could hardly understand. He didn’t know if he liked it, but his feet immediately tapped to keep the beat.

“You know who this is?” Namjoon asked with a smile, twirling the thin cardboard cover in his hands. His eyes widened when Yoongi shook his head, and he thought it was cute. “This is David Bowie. He’s a legend.”

Yoongi had heard of him, of course. He’d just never heard his music before. It was so different from anything he usually listened. And it was very different from what he occasionally heard on the radio. The music was infectious, though. Namjoon seemed very into it. He’d put down the cover, and started bobbing his head to the music, even going so far as to try and sing along with the refrain. It made Yoongi laugh out loud because it was far from Namjoon’s singing range, and soon the other man was laughing, too.

The next song came on, and Namjoon’s eyes lit up. He hurried over to Yoongi and pulled him up from his seat by his hands. “This song is called ‘Let’s Dance’ so we have to dance, Yoongi.” He grinned, already swinging their arms as they moved to a more open space. What they did could hardly be called dancing, but it was certainly fun. They swung their arms, slid over the wooden floor in their socked feet, and Namjoon even attempted to spin Yoongi around more than once. More than that, they ended up giggling at how ridiculous they probably looked, especially when Namjoon shimmied across the floor, awkwardly shaking his hips.

They went through Namjoon’s favorite songs like that, making up silly choreographies for each one as the songs played in the background. Yoongi didn’t even know if he liked all of the music, but he loved all the songs just because it was so fun. Some of the music was apparently obscure, some was new, but most of it was very energetic. It had been a while since Yoongi had so much exercise, and he was breathless by the time Namjoon had finished showing him the majority of his records.

He was about to sit back down on the couch to catch his breath, but Namjoon told him to hold on just for one more. It was a request he couldn’t refuse, so he stood by as Namjoon changed the record once more. The cover of this one was rather simple, white and black. Yoongi could never tell what would be coming out of the speakers, so he waited patiently, watching Namjoon intently as he set the song number.

“I don’t know why, but this song reminds me of you.” He said sheepishly, turning back around, and taking Yoongi’s waist this time.

It was surprising to say the least. The music that lilted out of the speakers was still in English, but it still made Yoongi feel a lot of things. Coupled with Namjoon’s words, he listened intently as his heart clenched at the sound of the song. The other man looked embarrassed, but couldn’t take his eyes off of Yoongi’s face, taking in his expression as they slowly swayed to the song. That feeling he’d had on the bus came back again. He felt his heart beating against his ribcage, and he could smell Namjoon’s cologne with a hint of sweat from all the dancing they’d been doing. The hand on his waist felt heavy and warm and welcome, and he stepped closer to Namjoon. His eyes stayed on Namjoon's chest, watching the faint rise and fall of his breathing. For some unknown reason, he was afraid to look at Namjoon’s face, but he could feel the other’s gaze on him. Everything felt warm and his skin felt tight, but as soon as the song started, it ended. At least, that’s what it felt like to him.

When the song changed, Namjoon cleared his throat awkwardly before letting Yoongi go to turn the record off. The silence made him feel like he’d lost his balance, that something wasn’t right. It just made the room feel so empty. Yoongi wrapped his arms around himself, and looked out the window. The sky had been dark when he’d arrived, but now it seemed like it was black outside, and he looked at his phone to confirm what he knew. It was late, and he should get home.

He looked back at Namjoon regretfully, shifting from foot to foot. “This has been really great, but I should get back home soon…”

That afternoon had held more fun for him than he’d had in a long time, so he was sad to go. His own apartment was small and empty by comparison. To go home now felt like a big let down, but he also wanted to crawl into bed and have the time to think about everything that had happened. It was a lot to take in for someone so used to spending his days on his own.

“Let me get you a jacket before you go. It’s getting cold out there… Oh! And I’ve gotta give you the guy’s numbers, or they’ll get upset with me. They really wanted to talk to you.” Namjoon admitted, pulling out his phone. He sent the contacts separately, Yoongi checking his phone for each one, until he had all five. “I’ll probably send them your number, too. Don’t be surprised if you get a barrage of texts tonight.”

“It’s okay.” Yoongi smiled, happy that his phone would be blowing up for once.

Namjoon disappeared into his room for a moment before coming back out with a comfortable but bright looking red jacket. He helped Yoongi put it on, and he was immediately drowning in the soft fabric. It was lined with navy fleece, and he was immediately warmer. He probably looked silly in something so oversized, but he loved it. And the fact it smelled like Namjoon was a plus.

“Thank you.” He said quietly, pushing up the sleeves so he could zip the jacket up. Namjoon watched him fondly.

“Is it okay if I walk you to the bus stop? You’ll know how to get back from there, right?”

Yoongi nodded, smiling when Namjoon did as well. He took the part of Yoongi’s hand peeking from the jacket sleeve, and they put their shoes on together before heading back out into the night air. This time, he wasn’t nearly as chilled, and he was warm up to his cheeks. Though, Namjoon was the reason for that. They were so close that their arms bumped and touched with every few steps.

When they reached the bus stop, Namjoon pulled him aside for a moment. “Thanks for hanging out with me tonight, I had a lot of fun. Next time, we can go out on a proper date together.”

“Okay, next time.” He replied softly, heart jumping in his chest.

Regrettably, the bus came a few minutes later, and Yoongi had to go. But not before Namjoon gave him a quick peck on the cheek, and squeezed his hand. That made it that much harder to go, but he didn’t want to miss his ride. He just sheepishly waved before running for the bus door, feeling like a blushing schoolboy. That was undoubtedly the best night he’d ever had, and he had to stop himself from squealing the whole bus ride home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it was very fun to write. We'll get to learn a little more about each of the boys in the coming chapters, but I hope that you enjoyed their introductions. Each of them will play a special part in Yoongi's journey. The namgi fluff will really continue from here, so I hope you enjoy it! Thanks for reading, and I'm hoping to update at least once a week!  
> Also, the song that made Namjoon think of Yoongi is Crystal by Fleetwood Mac. :)
> 
> My twitter and AUs are @lovinghyungline


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